Failure and new beginnings

Today was supposed to be the day that I made my final soup of the year - my final soup of 2009, a kickoff to the new year and the new decade. But ladies and gents, I failed miserably. Being short on cash, short on time, short with my family and boyfriend were all the greatest de-motivators one can imagine. With every random soup I made, I found myself sad that I wasn't taking pictures and thinking of how I could write the recipe in an interesting way. So, I admit it. I gave up. I got lazy, I got tired, and I got depressed to a point where soup and good food were simply not interesting at all.

So, now, my resolve is this:

For the entirety of 2010, I will start over. I will make a new pot of soup each week for the year. If I repeat any soups in 2010 that I made in 2009, they will be changed - a vegetarian soup will be made with meat or a meaty soup made vegetarian, or I'll try something new to spice up the original recipe. I will continue, no matter what. I will start again and again if one week I fail and feel like giving up for the entire year, as I did in 2009.

This year will be different.

I wasn't prepared for such a new resolve, but it was only yesterday that I remembered how therapeutic cooking is for me, and how much joy it gives me to think about delicious dishes and to prepare them with my own hands and wit.

Tonight, I'm making Menudo, as is my custom. Nothing about the age-old recipe will be changed, and for tonight, my family and I can enjoy what is tried and true and familiar. But next week? Or a few days from now? We'll be treated to something new. I'm already cooking up a plan, and it involves a sad little acorn squash that has lain uncooked since Thanksgiving.

Ladies and gents, if you could hear my thoughts, you'd hear only a wicked little cackle. I'm back.